Recent Mutterings at our house

Me: we aren't bells and whistles kind of people. 
Jacob: yeah...we're bells and horns

So true.

Says the boy recovering from a 4-day fever: chocolate feels me better!

Jonah, after swimming: " My eyes are burning. Can I put some chocolate in my mouth to feel them better?"

This is his general post-Easter-basket approach to life.

Joseph The Random (while playing pool basketball):
"man, I can't believe Israel didn't have one single righteous king...after 'the split' of course"

Jacob: Dad, can tell me why you like crushed red pepper so much?
Joe: Well, because I just like it on my food.
Jacob: Dad, I'm sorry. That isn't a very good answer. Can you tell me more? Maybe add an interesting opener or some dress-up words?

"Jonah, what is your favorite song?" 

Jonah: "Joy to the World. God is in it."

Oh, Joey...

"mom, now that Michael and Cat Cathalain Carter are in Japan, will their babies born there look Japanese?"

"Joe, come to the table for dinner." "Sorry, Mom. I'm writing a book. Let me finish this sentence."

"If I write a story about a donkey, am I allowed to say ass?" "uh, no!"

Jonah: "come on, mom, let's play Legos and have a fight." Me, as Lego girl: Ok, but how about we get a coffee and then get married?" Jonah: Well... we don't need swords for that. Lets bring them anyway." Girl then meets in the middle by picking a sword fight because he wouldn't marry her. :)

Joseph's random thought of the morning: mom, you know how some ladies who like to sing might say, "God gave me this song" and then they start singing...have you ever thought to yourself, "maybe you should give it back?"

Joseph: "Dad, look! A wine and spirits store. Wine lifts up your spirits!"

Jacob, with trepidation as we arrive at his Orthodontic consult: "Daddy said 'Just get it over with. With good teeth, you'll be able to marry a good woman.' Or something like that."

The church militant?