I was thinking yesterday about how poorly I'm tracking Jonah's development as he grows.  When Jacob and Joseph were this little, I was posting on xanga almost daily; not for anyone else's enjoyment but for my own journaling of their growing.  I recorded the things they said that cracked me up and I was intentional about it.

Life seems to be a blur right now and I don't know how moms with more children do it.  I get through each day and barely remember what we had for dinner, let alone the funny things the boys do and say.  I determine to write more and then fail.  In fact, each year I write a birthday letter to the boys...I'm now 3 behind.  I haven't written to any of them yet this year. ARGH!!

Joe and I keep talking about scaling back our commitments. But, we can't figure out what to cut. Between a demanding job, school commitments (not just homework but volunteer work), church commitments, and even neighborhood commitments, we are stretched pretty thin.

Tonight Jeremiah piled a bunch of pillows on the floor in front of our big green lounge chair (where I was sitting). At first he was trying to jump them. Then they became his springboard to land on me.  This was all done naked - still trying to get this almost-3-year old out of diapers - and I thought...I need to remember this.  He howled with laughter - a ver new, sinister and delightful laughter he has developed - each time.  Every day there is a very real possibility that his birth mom can call us and say, 'bring him back to me' and I'll not have this delightful, messy, loud, cuddly, disaster-causing boy to squeeze and love and snug.  I have to remember every detail.

We've had Jeremiah for 6 months and 1 week.  He is part of our family as if he was here from day 1, as we all believe he should have been.  He and Jonah breathe the same air.  We love him more and more all the time.  God has brought us this little miracle whom we never thought we'd meet.  He then provided a way for him to be given a Christian baptism and membership in our church.  He has given us more than we ever dreamed.  We are thankful; so thankful.  He turns 3 this week!

He has made very big progress with his speech and overall ability to communicate and express his thoughts and desires.  He answers us in full sentences and initiates conversations; not just, "i want.." He knows we are his family.  He clings to our hands, he squeezes us tight, he tells us he loves us, he hides behind us when he is uncertain, he calls us mommy and daddy and brother, he says Amen. All the time.

When he arrived, he didn't know what to do with a book. He threw them like they were balls.  He threw cars too.  Now, he insists on two books read to him before nap and bedtime.

In the meantime, Jonah turned 5 and has hit that hilarious stage of thought and speech.  Why aren't I writing them down???  Here is an example of random Jonah thought: "Mom! We should always have a jetski attached to our ship. Then if a shark or alligator come up, we just jet away."  And the best part of this line of reasoning is that we own neither jet ski or ship.  

Here is how Jonah and Joseph work together:  Jonah at dinner proceeded to tell us, "if you chug too much water too fast, it will go down the wrong hole and hit your heart and calories to your heart will make you weak and sleepy," 
to which Joseph replied, "No it won't! It'll go down your esophagus to your tummy and through your intesticles!"
Joseph turned 10. How on earth did that happen?? He continues to utterly slay us with his literal, dry humor.  On his birthday,  he sat and reflected, for he does a lot of that, on the significance of his birthday and overall life and then threw in for fun, "and you, mom, are half done with YOUR life..."  Just prior to his birthday he announced, "when I grow up, in my RV I'm going to have a close full of Doritos." With so many things wrong with this thought, I responded, "and at your funeral - because you'll die young if you're only eating Doritos - we celebrate your life in the RV" to which he said, "you can bury me under all the empty bags."

Worst of all for my mommy heart...Jacob turned 12 this week.  How did my baby, whom I swear I just bore, turn 12???  How has he already become a moody pre-teen with, as Joe puts it, flashes of brilliance that turn to head-of-the-jackass-club moments within seconds of each other?  I'm so hard on this poor kid, always on him about his homework and chores..and I hate it..but I still do it.

Although he has grown so much, he still keeps us laughing with the things he says, such as: In his plea for the purchase of certain baseball cards on eBay: 
"Come on, mom. Its the deal of a lifetime...well, after the Louisiana Purchase...but, second to that its the deal of a lifetime!" ..because one can really put the two in the same category.

A day to Remember

This is the day that the Lord has made. let us rejoice and be glad in it.  Yesterday, something happened in our family which, if you'd told me a week ago about it, I wouldn't have believed possible.  We met and brought home Jonah's full biological brother, Little J.  Yes, I meant full sibling.

This little guy, now 21/2, has been in our hearts since summer of 2010 when we heard from mom that she was having him and needed to find a home for him.  We cried, "yes! We will adopt him!" and began the proceedings, so excited at the thought of this new child in our family.

During the coming weeks, she asked that we bring Jonah for a visit. I did and it didn't go well.  Jonah was not quite 2, not feeling great that day, it was a hot and sticky August day and the surroundings were less than ideal.  He wanted me and only me to be anywhere near him.  This was too hard for mom to see and experience with the thought looming of "losing another" of her kids.  She decided to try to parent and a sweet older lady in her life said she would help.  Other family members begged us to hold on and keep hoping because they all felt it was the wrong decision and that she'd come to realize that.  Of course, we did hold on hope.

This kind woman worked hard to help mom get some stability in her life but it never really took.  Over the coming months, we would get a photo text from time to time that would make my heart stop...and then ache.  But it looked, at first, like things were going ok and we were pleased that she was successfully parenting.

We knew things took a less-than-ideal turn about a year ago but didn't hear anything from mom.  Around Jonah's birthday we did hear that she may need help but it turned out she didn't need OUR help.  We truly expected that to be the last we spoke to her in a long time.

So, you could have knocked me over...except I was driving so I guess that would be roll me over....when my phone rang last week asking if the offer still stood for us to take Little J.  We said yes and then heard...crickets...only crickets...for a week.  We took it as a reminder from the Lord to pray for Little J always and entrusted him to Jesus.

Late Wednesday, the next call came.  She needed someone to care for him and she wanted it to be us.  The sweet lady who had first helped her keep Little J now realized she needed to help mom make this next and very hard plan.  She asked how soon we could be there.  We jumped!

Thursday morning, calls to lawyers asking how to do something like this legally because mom is not yet ready to sign parental revoking consents, calls to mom, calls to and from sweet lady...it was beyond imagining how smoothly the Lord seemed to be working this out.  I was hesitant and a bit apprehensive. What will the future bring, I fretted.  How long will we have him?  What if, what if, what if?  What if he is perfect in our family?

The Lord made the path straight.  Mom was fully ready to sign and notarize, with her mom and grandma as witnesses, the custody affidavit.  This gives us protection and the right to care for him but she can revoke it at any time.  We met at a sweet little park and saw Little J for the first time (aside from pics). Here he was...the guy we've prayed for and wished had come from birth!

The time was not nearly as awkward as I feared.  We all fell in with each other well - and its been almost 3 years since we last saw mom.  Sweet Lady was there to meet us too.

The sweetest thing was Jonah's reaction.  He, being only 4 1/2 didn't have a comprehension ahead of time that he had a particular connection to Little J. He couldn't stop looking at him - I mean just staring at him.  Laughing all the while.  They ran off to play like they'd known each other forever.  There was a carousel at this park and as Jonah and Little J sat side by side on their horses with me in the middle, I said, "Jonah, do you think he looks a little like you?" and he said, "No, he looks ALL like me!" with such a proud smile.  

We all agreed to share dinner together and Little J rode with us so we could get to know him.  Jonah couldn't stop touching him and comparing hands, feet, skin.  Little J kept looking for his mama in the car ahead but it was quite distracted with the near smothering of attention and affection from 3 boisterous boys.

The hard part came when we packed his belongings into our van after dinner.  We cried and hugged and  mom settled him into his car seat.  He did amazingly well, again with the distracting help of 3 new big brothers.  Jonah, I'm so proud of him, he spent this strange and wonderful day in his life being hugged and squeezed by people he doesn't know but who love him and wanted to love ON him...and he let them (which isn't something he usually does). He played with two other siblings he had never met who were also there.  He knew something was unique here.  Of that I'm certain. He can't really articulate that but maybe one day he will.  

Little J has a "schedule" that doesn't quite match ours.  So, at 12:30 am he and I had a rousing game of patty cake over a yogurt snack.  This was sweet for me because he had not taken to me yet.  Beautifully, he took to Joe within seconds of meeting him.  And all he has wanted was Joe to hold him.  So, late-night patty cake with my new Little J was the sweetest way to spend the night.

What comes next?  We aren't sure. But we will love every minute of him and pray he can legally join our family in time.

Ps 118:23 This is the Lord's doing; it is marvelous in His sight.



  

Recent Mutterings at our house

Me: we aren't bells and whistles kind of people. 
Jacob: yeah...we're bells and horns

So true.

Says the boy recovering from a 4-day fever: chocolate feels me better!

Jonah, after swimming: " My eyes are burning. Can I put some chocolate in my mouth to feel them better?"

This is his general post-Easter-basket approach to life.

Joseph The Random (while playing pool basketball):
"man, I can't believe Israel didn't have one single righteous king...after 'the split' of course"

Jacob: Dad, can tell me why you like crushed red pepper so much?
Joe: Well, because I just like it on my food.
Jacob: Dad, I'm sorry. That isn't a very good answer. Can you tell me more? Maybe add an interesting opener or some dress-up words?

"Jonah, what is your favorite song?" 

Jonah: "Joy to the World. God is in it."

Oh, Joey...

"mom, now that Michael and Cat Cathalain Carter are in Japan, will their babies born there look Japanese?"

"Joe, come to the table for dinner." "Sorry, Mom. I'm writing a book. Let me finish this sentence."

"If I write a story about a donkey, am I allowed to say ass?" "uh, no!"

Jonah: "come on, mom, let's play Legos and have a fight." Me, as Lego girl: Ok, but how about we get a coffee and then get married?" Jonah: Well... we don't need swords for that. Lets bring them anyway." Girl then meets in the middle by picking a sword fight because he wouldn't marry her. :)

Joseph's random thought of the morning: mom, you know how some ladies who like to sing might say, "God gave me this song" and then they start singing...have you ever thought to yourself, "maybe you should give it back?"

Joseph: "Dad, look! A wine and spirits store. Wine lifts up your spirits!"

Jacob, with trepidation as we arrive at his Orthodontic consult: "Daddy said 'Just get it over with. With good teeth, you'll be able to marry a good woman.' Or something like that."

The church militant?

A tad behind

Each year I have a goal of writing a birthday letter to each boy.  I don't actually give them the letter. Odd, I know. But the goal is actually to chronicle their year for them so that when they are older, they have a year-by-year record of their lives.  I almost never actually get the letter written ON their birthday and then I fret about it until I have a few minutes to sit down and write it. After all, what if something happens to me and I owe the letter but haven't written it??!! 

So, its Oct. 7. Joseph's birthday is in 2 days and I haven't written Jonah's birthday letter.  Over a month late.  Yikes.  So, I just sat down and wrote it out. Oh, it has to be in my handwriting too. No typing.  

The year of 3-turning-4 is a great one. I find they begin to say the absolutely funniest things.  He has started this and I've not been as good about writing them down as I was with the others.  I guess thats the third child curse.  I've caught some of them on fb and can enjoy them over and over but there are many more that I've lost along the way. 

He has had a great year. He is a darling kid and we totally spoil him...which may make him less-than-darling pretty soon.  Yes, he has an occasional tantrum that earns a spanking but he is generally so agreeable and sweet spirited that its pretty hard to be tough with him.  Poor Jacob on the other hand. I think I'm too tough on him. Joseph is just in the middle doing his own thing and getting away with it, pretty much.  

We are in the heart of Fall baseball.  However, due to rain most games have been postponed.  This prolongs the season which can make a mama weary.  But with a really crazy travel schedule for Joe, I'm happy when a game is cancelled!

Ironically, its still Joseph who rocks our world with bizarre and randomly funny things like these:

"mom, to make a living I'm going to draw Foxtrot pictures and sell them for a buck."

(still dreaming of Yankees): "Mariano Rivera..it really WOULD be a pleasure to meet him...and I think his autograph would be worth something...he's been on the mound a long time"

"do you think autographs will be allowed in heaven? There are a lot I'll be wanting when I get there."

One evening at 10:30 when I caught him lying on the floor of his room painstakingly reading by the dim glow of his nightlight: "I can't help it, Mrs. Beatty has rekindled my love of reading!!"

 "mom, all I want for my birthday is to have a major league baseball player (say, Derek Jeter) come and you know, teach us some things. We'll have to postpone this until after the World Series so that he doesn't miss it." 

And yes, he wrote to invite them. Then wrote to Jeter and invited him directly. And is postponing any birthday celebrations until after the World Series, just in case.  He is still awaiting a response and I just don't know how to break it to him....

And one from Jonah:

Me: Jonah, I get a little sad when you leave me for school. 
Jonah: well...just go somewhere where people are so you don't get alone. 

 

Milestones

My baby is turning 4 this week.  This face: 

Not only is he turning 4, which I really can't wrap my mind around and really am not ready to accept, but he also started school this year.  This is strange since the other two didn't start until 7.  But our school needed some volunteer help that I am able to give and so we decided to enroll Jonah in their K4 class.  We love his teacher and I get to be at the school 3 days a week so I feel better knowing I'm literally around the corner from him.

He wore his Orioles hat to school.  Orioles, you ask? Why on earth? Well, a little friend at the ball field gave him an Orioles hat and now he has decided that they will be his team.  This further complicates our already divided household.  But, can you take that face right there?

He is one of 5 adorable little darlings. 

So, anyway, then there is mommy who is really TRYING to come to terms with the last of my babies not being a baby anymore.  I didn't really want there to be a last of my babies yet.  Yes, I'm kinda old now and Joe is, frankly, MORE old now and yes, my three keep me busy and yes, Joe still travels so I'm home with them alone a bit.  But, I'm still not able to take that crib down out of the guest room.  

This summer I managed to make some progress coming to terms with our end-of-babyhood with a big breakdown as I faced the reality (the same one thats been slapping my face for a year now) again that we are not adopting and we are not conceiving.  But, its a process and I'm not beating myself up over my occasional emotional backsliding. 

But, on the happy side of things, 4 is my favorite age.  Jonah is saying the most hilarious things every day.  These are the days, with my other two, where I was blogging daily with their sayings and questions and observations about life that are priceless.  Will I ever roll that well again, for poor Jonah's sake?  

The other day I told him I was sad that he is away from me while he is in school. His response was "well, get somewhere with people so you don't get alone."  Exceedingly sympathetic and practical, I thought.  Very proud. 

Joseph's obsession of the month is baseball and baseball cards.  He is utterly consumed by baseball statistics and I'd love for him to devour a good book (like he was doing last year at this time) like he does the box scores.  He has lost all interest in reading, something he couldn't get enough of last year.  Kind of a bummer but I hope its just a phase.  He adores his 3rd grade teacher (Mrs. Beatty rocks) and I think she'll spark his love of story again.   And, at least his obsession with Winter the Dolphin has passed. We were all weary of that one. 

Jacob was rather terrified of 5th grade and now that we are into the 3rd week of school, he has come to realize that his teacher was tricking them all. She isn't mean...like he thought. But she does require a lot of them...all reasonable...and he is getting his clock cleaned in his grades due to sloppiness.  We are about to embark on the bird and the bees talk.  He knows it and keeps running away when I tell him "its time to talk."  

So, I asked Jonah what he wanted to do with his friends on his birthday. "Swim. And eat meat." So we are having a carnivorous swimming party.  Should be fun! 

Another funny: During the Olympics opening ceremony, the video of John Lennon came on the screen and Jonah exclaimed: "Oh! Its Harry Potter growed up!"

Sleepaway Camp

So, yesterday Jacob left for his first sleep away camp. He'll be there until Friday evening.  The camp is only 35 minutes away and a long-standing baptist camp in the area.  There are 110 campers and he immediately saw boys he knew from town and is in a cabin with a few of them.  So, why did I panic last night??

What was I thinking? I'm not ready for this so surely he can't be! Wait! I didn't even ask what kind of security they have? Do they patrol at night? Is he safe? What?? Why did Joe tell me that he drove BY a correctional facility en route to the campsite??  Who is the crazy worried mother because it surely isn't me!  

He was very excited to go to camp until Saturday rolled around and we were packing his duffle bag. Suddenly the idea of being away hit him and he didn't want to go. He admitted, with shame, that he thought he'd miss me. Yea! He admitted it!  He was stoic as daddy drove him there and didn't really look very excited in the first evening's round of online parent-communicator photos.  I'm pretty sure he'll be fine.

Then Daddy begins to fret that we've given away a week of his life that we'll never get back. After all he is going to be exposed to pop Christianity lite, Americana style; be pressured to accept Jesus and pray the sinners prayer...each night; sing Jesus is my girlfriend songs rather than strong psalms and battle songs.  Oh what have we done? Is this the best we can send our son to?

Well, probably! I think he'll survive. I think he'll make good friends.  I think he'll learn verses he didn't know.  I think he'll be challenged.

But it has made us wonder if a camp is out there that dwells upon good Christian aesthetics while developing a boys' adventurer side.  If not, how can we start one?


Jonah line for the day, upon climbing into the bathtub and realizing I'd left a bra nearby, "Oh moooom, your woman's wear is in the way!"  New vocabulary.  Fun.

Joe was ordained as a deacon Sunday. We had Rev. Brito and his family for the weekend to do the ordaining.  He is the pastor of our sponsoring church all the way up in the Pan handle.  It was so so so lovely to have a wonderful minister to lead the service. Rev.  Brito's booming voice brought a level of enthusiasm to the service that was really delightful.  We sang so loudly at church and again at our house later that my voice is scratchy today.

Tomorrow, Joe accepts the nomination to become Chairman of the Board for Geneva Classical Academy.  He is excited about working with our new interim head master but there is much, much work to be done.  Boy, he has two really big new hats to wear.  Good thing I'm starting a book on prayer because I'll need to become more faithful to lift him up!

A recent photo of my silly boys.

Did I ever show you this one from New Year's? I call it Jonah's Horror at His White Brother's Attempt to be Hip.

Summer time

It seems I've developed an every-five month schedule to my writing.  Each time I regret the funny stories I've lost because I haven't kept up with my journaling.  Poor Jonah, classic third child with half the photos and half the memories recorded.

He is now rounding the bend and hitting the homestretch towards becoming 4. This is mingled with pride and sadness on my part.  He is my last baby and so each milestone is the last time we'll celebrate it for a while.  Just this week, his mouth began to form the L sound, which until now has come out like a W sound.  It is funny to watch his little tongue trip on it and spread each word out as he forms that sound. I love it and hate it.  Because I loved it when he told me he wuved me. He is growing up.

In another way, we are pushing him onward in ways we didn't with the other two.  He is starting K4 preschool in the Fall at Geneva so that I can volunteer there 3 days a week.  I'll be there in the same buildings with him and yet I feel like I'm sending him off so young (the other two were home until they were almost 7)

But exciting things are happening at our school and we are thrilled to be a part of it.  We've gotten a wonderful interim headmaster, a new facility and some great new teachers.

Joseph...oh, that kid goes through funny phases.  I often say Jacob is my heart baby and Joseph is my soul baby.  He thinks deeply (so deeply that he forgets half of what he is told within minutes because he is daydreaming) about things and enters in and out of deeply obsessive phases. Last year it was Dolphin Tale and Winter the dolphin. Now its baseball cards and all things Yankees.  Its hilarious how one-track his mind becomes.

Jacob is growing like a weed and wanting so badly to be grown up and then wanting so badly to be little.  He is going to sleep away camp for the first time this coming week and he is flying to NJ solo for the first time. He is excited beyond sleeping about NJ. But the reality of his departure for camp tomorrow afternoon has brought some hesitation. It'll be interesting to see how it goes.  He tends to chicken out of things when the time comes and if we succeed in pushing him past that fear, he ends up loving the thing he was so fearful of.

As usual, here are some of the funny things they've said recently:

Last week, Jacob moved part of nest that a bird built in our garage.  

"I didn't realize it was a nest until the bird flew back in and really gave me the stink eye!"




Jacob's morning pearl from a few days ago: ya know how Shakespeare said, "let me compare thee to a Summer's day"...well, I don't think you want to say that to anyone who loves in Florida!

"they're snug enough that they stay up but flexible enough that they don't nag" ...Jacob on the virtues of new underpants.


I often lament the starving people in North Korea because I recently read "Nothing to Envy" which I highly recommend. So my boys really hear it when they don't want to eat their dinner. This is some context for the following:

Joseph: "I'm so hungry I could eat as much as a starving Asian and TWICE as much as an Asian Minor!"


We met sweet new neighbors last month and we are really excited to get to know them. This sentiment was quadrupled when the boys learned that the Mr. has coached baseball for a long time and has a pitching machine! "Things are going to get fun around here!" - Joseph.
Because its been a real dud.


"But mom! When you shoot it, you feel so triumphant!"  Jacob, growing too fond of his Airsoft gun. 


Upon returning home from a dinner, Jacob reported to me that his handling of Jonah's bad attitude tonight entailed a graphic description of what happens when one lives a life of grumpiness "your skin wrinkles, you dry up, your hair falls out and then your toes fall off and then your nose and then..." etc.
Effective? Well, apparently it turned the grump to laughter and made the babysitter willing to return.


You know you are in for an interesting day when the first words uttered by your sweet, lovable 3-year old, upon waking are, "you wanna smell my armpit?"


Jonah: Watch out, mom! That truck will squash you like a pig!
Those figures of speech will getcha every time.




Jonah: "I love you a wittle bit, mom but I don't wike when your hair is falling down."
It's important to always be open to constructive criticism


Jonah: "wet's weave the brudders at school cuz they kiss and punch me."


Jacob " you know, mom, there is a LOT of debatement about Joan of Ark! I'm with the people who think she was a little cooky."


Jonah: "I wike hugs, mama. Saaweezen me tight!"


Me: "I'm so hungry I could eat a house." Jonah: "oh mudder! That would be yucky for you. Silly mom."


When Jonah is wanting something, he always says, "let's go to the pooter dot com!"


Jonah likes to tell us "we are losing time" when we are out and about and he wants to get back home.


Tucking Jonah in one night I said "let's pray for Daddy as we miss him tonight." He patted my cheek and said "oh honey, don't worry about it. He'll be home in two minutes."



As the big boys bickered over opening a window Jonah shouted, " just stop! If a spider bit you, you'd need a bandaid!"
Thankfully his random cry did bring a pause.


Dinner table randoms:

Jacob: "it's good to teach really little kids about Christ...in case they get kidnapped by a pagan family a little later...loving God will already be sunk in"

After this convo, my Joseph pipes in with his dinnertime thoughts: "yeah, I'm saving my money til I have a fortune. Like $5 or $11."


I called Jonah a goober. He told me I was a bigger goober but it came out 'gibber boober.' How long will this be a running joke in our house?




My happy 3 year old tries to score a juice box by claiming "it will feel me better!"


Joseph: "I disagree with Mrs. Smith on several cursive letter formings."

Joseph: "Mom, can we get some beverages?" Me: "beverages??" Him: "Yeah, it's a plural word."


As we were discussing whether we liked a particular breakfast joint nearby that is owned by Christians, Jacob's assessment: "well, I don't see how you can be Godly when you serve margarine..."


Things I learned today:

From Joseph: "Mom, did you know that Ben Franklin wanted our national bird to be the turkey instead of the bald eagle?" Me: "No, I didn't know that...must be because we're all a bunch of turkeys. haha." J, not getting my joke: "No...I'm pretty sure it was because turkeys taste better."

From Jacob: "There is no better way to butter a man up than to feed him a big, juicy steak." (upon hearing steaks were on the dinner menu because dad had invited one of his employees over for dinner)